Cancel That Call to Mr. Ripley

It turns out that six and seven beans per pod are quite common. A pod yielding eight beans (pinto) was the all time record. Believe it or not!

I'm starting to think of the garden in past tense. Most of the bean plants are yellowing or dry as a stick, so my mom suggested that they have gone through their life cycle, or it has just been too hot. I'm debating whether to put in another row or take a break.

Now allow me to demonstrate for you the literal meaning of being a "bean-counter."

Since the beginning of this project, I have collected enough pinto and Anasazi beans to cover one cookie pan each about a bean deep. This works out to three cups (or 17.5 oz) of Anasazis. I'm too discouraged to measure the pintos, mainly because today at the grocery store I bought a one-pound bag of KIDNEY BEANS for 98 cents. I put a lot more than $2.14 worth of effort into my beans but if we depended on that little garden for survival we'd have been dead long ago.

More green tomatoes went into the compost pile. Well, not entirely green, but splotched with brown gooshy rotting necrotic gibbosities. I know, a good back-to-the-lander would have cut off the firm parts and made green tomato chow-chow, but why waste time decorating something I'm just going to throw away eventually anyway? The three tomatoes that ripened were as spectacular as a fond mother could want, but not counting the cost of water they come to four dollars apiece, plus tax. Any problems with my math I will be glad (no, that's not the word) to address in another post.

On the other hand, it has been cheap entertainment. You can be a farmer or you can be a gardener. The farmer is more concerned with yield and productivity, while the gardener enjoys the process and the prettiness. To the first it's a livelihood, to the second it's a hobby. Or at least that's what I'm telling myself. I mean, I planted stuff and things grew and made me happy. I just didn't know I was supposed to mulch and add complicated mixtures in 3-5-1 ratios of complex elemental molecules of secret gardening formulae and poultry-extracted compost, as I now find out while googling why my tomatoes are rotting on the vine. Turns out I was supposed to do a bunch of soil preparation and move to a cooler climate.

Well, live 'n learn, unless you're a tomato with sunscald. Now where do I sign up to get paid for not planting next year?